Glaceau Smartwater - a Bottled Water Disappointment
Mon Mar 9, 2020

I'm not usually a big bottled water drinker (tap water, either filtered or not depending on the area, is good enough for me) but sometimes you're caught in a situation where the only available drinking water is the bottled stuff, and in my case, the available bottled water was Smartwater. I'm not a fan of bottled waters. They're expensive (pro tip: all licenced bars in the UK will serve tap water for free, even if you're not ordering anything else), all the plastic waste generated from them is ridiculous, and the quality of the water is usually not better enough to justify the price.

Smartwater is something different. It's a "vapor distilled" water (and as far as I know, the only one sold as a drinking water). I did some research and it turns out "vapor distillation" is no different from other forms of distillation, so you can put that one down to marketing. It also has added electrolytes - presumably because drinking purely distilled water is thought to have negative health effects. This leads to an interesting example of an almost mineral-free water. So, how does it taste?

The Smartwater bottle promotes a "crisp, clean taste", and I have to say, I think it's correct. Well, if by "clean" you mean "completely flavorless" This water really is ridiculously bland, as you might expect from a distilled water. The minerals in water are what gives it a flavor, and Smartwater has nearly none (aside from the re-added ones) so it tastes of absolutely nothing. I drank a whole bottle of the stuff and not once did I get any hint of any flavor at all. Drinking Smartwater is like drinking the ghost of a bottle of water. At least there's no chlorine taste, but that's common to all bottled waters.

Glaceau Smartwater is a disappointing drink. It has no flavor to speak of, and it comes at a premium price because of that.


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